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In my profession, I work with big corporations to help lead their employees through team building exercises to help them better connect and work as a whole. Ever now and again I’ll see two people work in a way where I can tell they’re romantically involved. Without fail, when I ask these people about their relationship, they’ve either been dating or are husband and wife. How can I tell? Men send off signals towards women they’re interested in that are different from those they send to people they are strictly platonic with, like friends or co-workers.

I see the same signals when a man and woman are friends, but the man is interested in turning it into something more. By familiarizing yourself with these signals, you’ll better be able to detect them when they’re being directed at you.

If he looks at your hands more…
If you notice a male friend looking at your hands, there’s a good chance he has invested feelings that have nothing to do with the word ‘platonic.’ Men have a subconscious yearning for a women with hands that are a good fit for him. What does this mean? Usually men want hands that are slightly smaller than theirs, but not significantly smaller, as they take that as a sign that the relationship will be unbalanced. Nail shape and color is something they look at as well- If he’s a type A personality who needs structure in his life, he’ll look for more traditional nails like a simple french manicure or clean, unpolished nails, while if he’s looking for a passionate sex life, he’ll be more drawn towards red and black nails. Men who aren’t interested in getting involved with friends dating won’t take notice in your digits.

If he touches your hair…
Men have a connection they make between hair and sex. If you’re someone they don’t think about sexually, like a relative or co-worker, they won’t be able to tell if you cut 18 inches off of your hair. If they’re interested in taking you to bed, their mind won’t automatically go to taking off your clothes with his imagination, it goes to your hair. Since it’s the one thing women generally never cover up, it’s easy for men to creatively think about. When thinking about grabbing or stroking it during sex, they usually stare it without knowing. If you catch a male friend commenting on your new ‘do or looking north of eye level, don’t assume you’re having a bad hair day!

If he changes the subject when you’re talking about other guy friends…
Put yourself in his shoes for this one. You’re just friends with a girl who you’re finding yourself becoming more and more attracted to. Wouldn’t you assume that other guys are finding themselves in that position as well? If you’re talking about other male friends, even if they’re mutual friends, and he changes the subject, it’s because he simply doesn’t want to think about you spending your time with other men.

If you watch for these signs, it’ll become blatantly  obvious when he’s looking to make a move. You can do many things to either accept or reject these signals, but that’s a blog for another day.